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A Story Based on a Claritin Ad.

The assignment was simple: pick any ad from a magazine with two models in it and write a story about them, using the layout of the ad as a setting and anything in the picture, and adding additional elements as needed.

Here is the picture:

Johann sat in his replica Titanic deck chair, looking lovingly at Hilda, his wife. She looked up from her magazine. “What?” she asked.

“I just stopped working on this article for a minute to think about the divine beauty over there,” Johann said smiling.

“Oh?” Hilda replied, frowning. “Where is he?”

“What? I meant—” Johann began.

“I know what you meant, you son of a bitch! You were thinking of that gigolo of yours again, weren’t you?” Hilda shouted at him.

“Gigolo? What—who—” Johann attempted to say.

“I know you’ve been cheating on me with the pool boy, Joe; you can’t fool me.” Hilda began to cry.

Johann got up and went over to his wife. He opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted before he could make a sound.

“Get the hell away from me!” Hilda screamed through her tears. She got up suddenly and began kicking at the hundreds of flower pots that were strewn about the deck.

“Hilda! What are you doing?” Johann seemed completely surprised and confused by his wife’s sudden outburst.

“You bastard!” Hilda screamed, grabbing the table that held her breakfast, spilling the food and beverages to the ground. She tried to hit Johann with it, but he dodged. The shoddily built table came apart, the top flying off and up into the air above Hilda as she swung it over her head and over the railing of the deck. An instant later it came crashing down on her head.

Johann nearly vomited at the sight of all the blood. It was still pouring out when young Arturo arrived. Seeing all the blood, Arturo rushed into the house to get the phone, but Johann stopped him.

“I think she’s dead,” Johann said slowly.

“But shouldn’t we still—” Arturo began.

“No. Go and bring your van around back.” Johann told him.

By the time Arturo had brought the van around, Johann had wrapped a large towel round his dead wife’s head and was hosing the rest of the blood off the deck.

“Get her into the van before anyone sees.” Johan told Arturo, who quickly did as he was told.

As soon as Arturo had closed the rear doors of the van, Johann told him, “Now go and get one of her bathing suits; I think she keeps them in her dresser, the tall one.”

They soon had Hilda dressed in a bathing suit. The bleeding had stopped and the blood was getting sticky in her hair. Arturo parked the van in the shade so the body wouldn’t start to rot before evening when they would throw it in the ocean; it would look as if she had been swimming and hit her head on unseen rocks.

When the unpleasant business was done, Johann led Arturo into the large master bathroom. They stripped each other and got into the shower together. When they had been cleansed of the blood, they burned their stained clothes in the fireplace, then lay down in the bedroom to make love.


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